A toast to the new year!

According to yoga, the purpose of the whole or creation is to give us a context for understanding what we are and what we are not.... A person who experiences kaivalya see prakrti, the material world, simply as it is, with no meaning beyond that... 

By praticing asanas we become more flexible; by practicing pranayama, we gain control of our breath. It is similar with kaivalya: something gradually happens that is out of our control....

There are two forces within us: one comes from our old conditioning and habits; the other is our new conditioning that develops out of our changing behavior. As long as these two forces are operating, the mind is swinging from one to the other. But when the old force disappears, the mind no longer swings back and forth. We have reached another state, and it is felt as a continuum. 

-The Hear of Yoga, T. K. V. Desikachar

I was sitting back enjoying my son and his friend's independent play, while I read this last work.
It is cool to think that we can have the power to control our relationships to things and to people in our lives. The secret is simple, and yet difficult. All that I have to do is to understand who I am, and who I am not. I am not my job, my car, my stuff, etc... I am not in control of what others think that I am...
I am my own person, independent and yet interconnected. I am lucky to start this process of reflection:)

Svadhyaya...

Svadhyaya is the 4th Niyama

Sva = "self" and Adhyaya = "examination"

Because we cannot always just sit down and contemplate things. We need reference points. For many this may be the Bible or a book that is of personal significance... The Heart of Yoga, T.K.V. Desikachar

...As long as you are trying your very best, there can be no question of failure. 

Mahatma Gandhi

Yesterday I presented Svadhyaya with Wendy to our group of yoga-teacher-studiers. We decided that it would be nice to serve everyone tea. 

Taking tea in a unique mug, with clean water, organic lemon and local honey is svadhyaya. 

We are the mug, filled with water. Like lemons and honey; our lives are filled with the bitterness of attachments and the sweetness of love.

- Take some time to enjoy your tea.

Keep it real...

As best we can, we show others what we have seen up to now. 

It's at best a progress report, a map of our experiences by no means the absolute truth. 

And so the adventure unfolds... and we need each other's help.

Wherever You Go There You Are by Jon Kabat-Zinn

Like teaching art, teaching yoga will be tough to lead a class (at times to people who have more experience than myself). But this quote helps lead me back to being a "humble yogi" with nothing but my practice, my experiences and a few tools in my back pocket. 

(How do I hide these tools without pockets in my yoga pants, you will never know).

Moral to this story:

Keep it real.

Peace...

People measure their esteem of each other by what each has, and not by what each is... 

Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

There is a quiet kind of peace you get when walking over a solid packed foot of snow. It feels like you are floating (or at least walking in those old 80's style moon boots). My center of gravity thrown off without fear of falling. What's the worst that's going to happen, I fall in the powdery stuff. 

The snow absorbs the city noises, and is such a fine reminder of how when a million of anything decide to through a party, havoc ensues. 

Kind of funny to see a 18 wheeler get stuck in snowflakes that are smaller than my finger nail!

Mornin'

Morning is when I am awake and there is a dawn in me... We must learn to reawaken and keep ourselves awake, not by mechanical aids, but by an infinate expectation of the dawn...It is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look... To affect the quality of the day, that is the highest of the arts. 

Thoreau, Walden

Anyone who knows me, might be surprised by this post. I'm less than a morning-person. In fact if I had it my way, I'd go to bed at 2 and get up at 10. sigh. No luck with that. So I've been doing what I can to wake up without relying too much on coffee or chai. My brief yoga morning practices have helped, when I'm not being crawled on by my kids/dog. 

This being said, I've started looking forward to my time on my mat:)

Day to Day...

This chopping wood and carrying water is karma yoga... the yoga of daily life. The way to do it is: Do what you do, but dedicate the fruits of the work to me...That's the most esoteric way of saying it. Another way of saying it is, do it without attachment... 

page 54 of Remember Be Here Now

So, I got to work today with a sinking feeling that it was going to be a rough start. Whala, I was right. 

I had to get a sub for 3 days last week and the students made her, "run for the hills." Many things happened that I don't need to mention here, but in the end I had to make a choice. 

Do I become overwhelmed with these things that are in the past? Should I worry about how I can never get the flu and get a sub to take care of my classes in the future? 

I tried to dig deep into my non-attaching soul and figure out this little bump-in-my-ego's-road. 

Why does this situation really bother me? I feel embarrassed that my classes were out-of-control, and that maybe they are always out-of-control, and I don't even notice! 

It makes me question my abilities and my calling. 

I'm lucky to have loving people that I work with, and sisters that I can call, who help me to pick up the pieces and patch it all back together. I'm also lucky to have my home yoga practice. 

I'm starting to look forward to it and reflect about the these waves will return to a calm.